Hiding No More
by bcsm
Summary: One-Shot: What if Beckett didn't kick Castle out of her life and apartment at the end of their argument in "Knockout?" Here is a very different ending to that scene. This obviously this takes place during episode 3X24. I don't own Castle and Beckett, but I really enjoy borrowing them for a little fun.


_A/N Before my fic begins, I have included the exact dialogue that took place in Beckett's apartment between C and B during their argument in "Knockout." I wanted to remind everyone of exactly how the argument went down, even though I'm sure most of you remember it. My AU take on how things could have played out very differently, starts after Castle's last line from this scene._

CASTLE

"Can I come in?"

BECKETT

"Yeah."

CASTLE

"So, we went over all of Raglan and McCallister's old arrest records, and you were right, there was a third cop that was with them on a lot of those arrests. But, then someone went back into those reports and removed their name. So, Ryan and Esposito are right now looking into who was running the records room back then."

BECKETT

"Castle, you couldn't've just called me and told me this over the phone?"

CASTLE

"Well, yeah, I... I thought that..."

BECKETT

"Castle, if you got something to say, just please say it."

CASTLE

"Beckett, everyone associated with this case is dead. Everyone. First your mom and her colleagues, then Raglan, then McCallister. You know they're coming for you next."

BECKETT

"Captain Montgomery's got a protective detail on me. Wasn't that hard to spot."

CASTLE

"That's not going to be enough to stop Lockwood; you know that. Think about what they're up against. Professional killers? I-I've been working with you for three years; you know me. I'm the guy who says we can move that rubber tree plant. But you know what, Beckett? I don't think we're gonna win this."

BECKETT

"Castle, they killed my mother. What do you want me to do here?"

CASTLE

"Walk away. They're gonna kill you, Kate. And if you don't care about that, at least think about how that's going to affect the people that love you. You really want to put your dad through that? And what about Josh?"

BECKETT

"And what about you, Rick?"

CASTLE

"Well, of course I don't want anything to happen to you. I'm your partner. I'm your friend."

BECKETT

"Is that what we are?"

CASTLE

"Alright, you know what? I don't know what we are. We kiss, and then we never talk about it. We nearly die frozen in each other's arms, but we never talk about it. So, no, I got no clue what we are. I know I don't want to see you throw your life away."

BECKETT

"Yeah, well, last time I checked, it was my life, not your personal jungle gym. And for the past three years, I have been running around with the school's funniest kid, and it's not enough."

CASTLE

"You know what? This isn't about your mother's case anymore. This is about you needing a place to hide. Because you've been chasing this thing so long, you're afraid to find out who you are without it."

BECKETT

"You don't know me, Castle. You think you do, but you don't."

CASTLE

"I know you crawled inside your mother's murder and didn't come out. I know you hide there, the same way you hide in these nowhere relationships with men you don't love. You could be happy, Kate. You deserve to be happy. But you're afraid."

As soon as the words had left his mouth Castle knew that he had gone to far, crossed a line that he probably shouldn't have crossed. He stared at Beckett, bracing himself for her response, but much to his surprise, none came.

Beckett had listened to every word Castle had said since he walked into her apartment, anger building up inside her as their conversation progressed. What nerve he had, speaking to her the way he did. Her immediate thought was to yell at him, kick him out of her apartment, kick him out of her life even, but something stopped her. The truth was, as infuriating as he could be sometimes, she didn't want him out of her life, it was quite the opposite and she was painfully aware of that. So instead of saying anything, she bit her tongue and turned her back to him. She took a couple of deep breaths and felt some of her anger dissipate. She replayed Castle's words in her head. He was right, she thought. As hard as it was to hear, he was right. Deep down Beckett knew that everything Castle had just said to her was true.

"Kate," Castle said in a much more gentle voice than the one he had just used, "I'm sorry. I know I overstepped and I...I sincerely apologize."

Beckett remained silent. When castle received no response he continued,

"I came here tonight because everyone who cares about you is very worried about your safety. I honestly didn't mean for things to escalate the way they did."

Beckett still said nothing. Castle stared at the back of her head and waited for a moment, then he sighed and said,

"I guess maybe I should go."

He started moving towards her door.

"Wait Castle, don't." she called out.

He stopped and looked at her as she turned to face him.

"You're right." she said, most of the traces of anger gone from her face.

"I'm right?" Castle replied, as if asking a question.

"You overstepped." Beckett said.

Castle lowered his eyes.

"I know I did and I'm sorry." he replied.

Beckett looked at him. She took another deep breath, trying to summons the courage to say what she was about to say.

"But, you're also right about everything else." she said, as she turned and walked towards her kitchen.

Castle stood there, stunned. Kate Beckett was constantly surprising him, but never more so then in this moment.

"I could use a drink." Beckett said as she pulled a bottle of white wine out of her refrigerator.

"Would you like a glass?" she asked.

"Um…sure, Okay." Castle replied, somewhat in shock at the turn of events.

Beckett took out two wine glasses. There was no turning back now, she thought to herself as she started to open the bottle of wine. Her hands were trembling a bit as she tried to work the corkscrew. She glanced up and saw Castle staring at her.

"Do you want some help with that?" he asked.

"It's alright, I got it." she replied as she steadied her hands. This was certainly not how she thought she would be spending this evening, but you had to give it to Castle. He had been able to see right through the facade she had carried around for quite some time now and he had the balls to call her on it. She felt completely exposed, but it was also liberating in a way. The two of them had been dancing around each other for far too long and it was time for her to be truthful with him and hopefully for him to be truthful with her, though she had alway felt that he was more of an open book then she was.

Beckett finally managed to open the wine and poured them each a glass. She stepped towards Castle, handed him one, then turned around and grabbed her own glass and the bottle of wine and walked to her couch. Castle took a large sip of wine and followed her.

"So." he said, as he sat down next to her. He wasn't sure what to say next and that was definitely foreign territory for him.

Beckett took an equally large sip of her wine and looked at Castle.

"So." she said, then paused a moment before continuing, "Look Castle, I'm not even sure where to start exactly, but the things you said, you were right. It's all true."

"Beckett, my words were way too harsh." Castle quickly replied.

"They were indeed harsh." she agreed, "but they were also accurate. Honestly, I'm not happy and I haven't been truly happy since my mom died."

Beckett took another sip of wine then added,

"You know Castle, some of the happiest moments Iv'e experienced in the past three years, have been moments that I have spent with you." Her heart stated beating a little faster and she searched Castle's face for his reaction.

He looked very surprised and then he smiled, but before he could say anything Beckett's phone rang. She reached over and picked it up and after glancing quickly at the screen, she promptly turned it off.

"Josh?" Castle questioned.

"Yep." Beckett replied. She looked down at her phone, sighed, then said,

"You know, I must have thought about ending things with him at least a dozen times during the past couple of months."

Castle looked at her, he couldn't believe this was Kate Beckett sitting in front of him. She was being so open, so revealing. He wasn't quite sure what to make of it, but this was the kind of conversation he had longed to have with her, so he was going to take full advantage of it.

"So why are you still with him Kate?" he asked.

She looked up at him and simply said,

"You."

"Me?" he replied, "What does that mean exactly?" he asked.

"It means that his presence acts like a barrier between us and it allows me to hide, just like you called it, earlier." she admitted.

Castle was silent for a moment, then he said,

"I don't want you to hide anymore."

He reached out and touched her hand briefly, then continued,

"Hiding doesn't work. In a way I tried to do the same thing with Gina, but trust me, it didn't work at all."

"I know." Beckett said "It's not working for me either." She paused for a second then asked,

"Castle do you remember the little going away party the boys threw for you before you headed to the Hamptons to write last summer?"

"Sure." he answered, slightly confused about the sudden turn the conversation had taken.

"Why?" he asked as he took a sip of his wine.

"If you recall, I pulled you aside to speak to you right before you left." she said.

"I recall." he replied, eyebrows raised slightly.

"Well, the truth is, I never got the chance to tell you most of what I wanted to tell you that night." Beckett said. She paused and poured them each a little more wine.

Castle thought back to that conversation. Beckett had said what a good time she had had woking with him and something about her being a hard person to get to know. He remembered at the time being pleasantly surprised that she had been so open, so personal.

"What else did you want to tell me?" he asked.

"Well, first off you should know that earlier that day, I actually ended my relationship with Demming."

"What?" he asked, again in a shocked voice. "You broke things off with Demming, before I left for the summer?"

"I did." she replied

"I can't believe it." Castle said, shaking his head a little.

Beckett reached out and took Castle's hand in hers. She took deep breath.

"Castle," she continued, "when I asked to speak with you that night, I was going to tell you that Demming wasn't in the picture any more and suggest that we try spending a little time together, away from the precinct, maybe take you up on that offer you made me, of a weekend in the Hamptons. Before I was able get those words out, Gina showed up and well, I think you know what happened after that."

Castle closed his eyes for moment, trying to wrap his head around everything Beckett had just revealed. She had been ready, he thought. A year ago she had been ready and he blew it by letting things start up again with Gina. He opened his eyes and looked at Beckett.

"I'm so sorry." he said.

"You didn't do anything wrong." Beckett quickly replied.

"Sure I did." Castle said. "I couldn't handle watching you and Demming anymore so I ran away. I went to hide in the Hamptons and with my ex-wife and look, that decision ended up changing everything."

"I don't know," Beckett said, "The fact is it was you leaving, that forced me to confront my own feelings to begin with. Had you not told me that we were working our last case together, who knows how much longer I would have been in denial."

Beckett paused and squeezed Castle's hand gently then said,

"When you didn't get in touch with me after the summer was over, I tried to push you out of my mind. Then much to my surprise you entered my life again, as a suspect at a crime scene, but by then I had built up my defenses again. You were still with Gina, so when Josh came along….well, he was great on paper and he was the perfect place for me to hide again."

"What a pair we are." Castle said with a little smile as he shook his head and placed his other hand on top of Beckett's

"Are you saying we deserve each other?" Beckett said with a little smile of her own.

"We do deserve each other." Castle replied in a more serious tone. "We both deserve happiness and you Detective Beckett, make me happy and for quite some time now, all I have wanted, was to be the one who makes you happy."

"You are the one." Beckett said softly, while locking eyes with him.

A feeling of peace settled over her as she gazed into his eyes. She felt freer than she had in a long time. She wasn't, at least for the moment, thinking about Lockwood or her mother's murder. She wasn't hiding her feelings anymore. She had finally been completely honest with Castle and he had been honest with her and it was totally liberating.

Castle brought his hand up to the side of her face. His heart rate quickened. He had longed for Beckett since their first case together. He had fallen in love with her at some point during the past two years. His gut had always told him that the feelings were mutual, but as of late, he had begun to think she would never acknowledge those feelings, yet here they were. It was a dream, except it wasn't, this was actually happening.

He leaned his head slightly towards hers. She quickly closed the gap between them and pressed her lips to his. He kissed her softly at first, wanting to savor every extraordinary second. She indulged his pace for a few moments, before the temptation became to much and her tongue forced it's way past his lips. He allowed his tongue to join in the fun as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her body flush with his own. She grabbed the back of his head, running her fingers though the soft hairs at his neck. She tasted amazing. He tasted amazing. They had gotten a small glimpse of how good they would be together when that shared that undercover kiss a few months back, but this was real and it was everything they had each fantasized about and more. Castle let one of his hands venture to her waist and it found its way under her shirt. Her skin was soft and warm. She started to pull his shirt out from under his belt, when she suddenly stopped.

"Castle wait." Beckett said breathlessly, while pulling her lips away from his and gently pushing on his chest.

"We should stop." She added.

"What's wrong." Castle asked, his heart sinking.

"As much as I want to, we shouldn't let this go any further." she replied. She took a deep breath, then added,

"I really need to end things with Josh first. I owe him that and honestly, I owe us that as well."

Castle nodded his head, removed his hand from her waist and pulled back a bit.

"You're right." he agreed, "No more hiding." he added.

"No more hiding." she repeated with a small smile. She paused for a moment, then said,

"Josh is actually in town this week. His shift will be over soon. I am going to call him back and ask him to come over so we can talk."

"Are you sure you're up for that tonight?" Castle asked, his head reeling from the events of the evening.

Beckett sighed.

"Not really, but there is never a good time for that kind of conversation," she replied, "Plus I have put it off for far too long as it is and honestly, I would really like to wake up tomorrow and start anew."

"I like the sound of that." Castle said.

He smiled at her and stood up.

"Well, I guess I should go then, give you some time to collect your thoughts and make that call." he said.

"I don't want you to go, but yeah, that's probably a good idea." she replied.

Castle started making his way towards Beckett's front door and she followed him. Before opening it, he turned around to face her.

"Kate." he said, with a serious expression, "With everything that went on here tonight, please don't forget the reason I came over."

"Castle, you know I can't just walk away from Lockwood." Beckett said.

"I wish you would." Castle replied, "But if you can't, then at least promise me you will take every precaution to keep yourself safe. No impulsive, reckless moves. Everything needs to be well thought out, with plenty of backup. Promise me that, please."

"I promise." she said, "I know what's at stake." she added as she reached over and held his face with both her hands.

Castle leaned towards her and gently kissed her. She kissed him back then said,

"Until tomorrow."

Castle smiled at her and said,

"Look who's being all hopeful now."

She gave him one of her patented Beckett smiles. He leaned in and kissed her one more time, then said as he opened her door,

"Until tomorrow Detective."

The end.

_A/N Thank you for taking the time to read Hiding No More. I really hope you enjoyed it! Reviews are always welcome and appreciated!_


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